I'VE CHANGED A LOT WITHIN 4 FUCKIN' YEARS

IDGAF

Last time I was a lover then I've been cheated and I convert into a gamer. So there's nothing weird. I just a guy who tried so hard to forget his past and start a new one. Some people don't and some do understand me. And IDGAF for those "god" out there who judging me like they know every piece of shit I've made.

Dear GA

Dear Ayuni, Guardian Angel. I'm sorry for everything. I couldn't make you happy. It's all my fault, my bad, my mistake, my stupidity, all on me. I'm sorry i'd broke your heart. I've made you cried almost everyday. I don't care bout my heart. All i care is you. I always love you. I'll wait for you. I'm just afraid that i might hurt you again. All i can say is i'm sorry over and over again. :(

I'm A Strong and Independent Person

I'm scared to fall in love again because once I fall for someone whom I thought will be my forever shining star but I was wrong. Now, I don't think I'm ready to fall in love again. I'm just to scared to do it again. I'm scared to be hurt once again. I just fixed my broken-heart. I don't want to have another person to unlock my heart. It's just too hard to do. But maybe, I can love someone again but not this time. not this time that I'm too weak. Living in a world of hatred, bitterness, sadness and madness is just too cruel. They say that Loving someone is unexpected and unstoppable. I think it's right. But if I won't give another chance in myself to love once again. I will forever regret it and I won't get another lesson to learn. Hurting is not a punishment nor a sin. It's just a proof that you loved a person way too much that you forgot to leave a little love for yourself and especially to God. Hurts are a lesson. God gives us a lesson everyday. It is a lesson wherein you will become a strong and independent person in the future. It is a lesson wherein you will love a person not that much and you'll know how to have a close-to-perfection relationship. So I think I'm not ready yet to be in love again but I learned my lesson. 

What lesson? : "To not give so much love to a person especially when you're not ready" and " THERE'S NO SERIOUS RELATIONSHIP WHEN YOU'RE NOT IN THE RIGHT AGE."

Never Be Replaced

there's a secret in my wallet. a love letter. hahaha. it's kinda funny. cause i kept that thing for almost 6 years. so, here we go. keep reading. aku ambik part yang sweet-sweet je. maklum lah aku dari dulu memang sweet pun. LOL! hahahahaha. :D

"first of all i wanna say i'm sorry cause doin' all this shit to you. i'm not a good BF. i always make you cry. i know you love me so do i. i still remember when we on-the-phone 5 hours non stop. that time was your birthday. i had nothing to give you so i overnight with you on-the-phone. we shared soo many stories, laugh, tears, jokes. thanks cause loving me even it just for awhile, spend your time with me, take care of me, make me smile. make me happy when i'm sad thanks for everything. promise with me you'll find better person. way much better than me. take care. i can't do that anymore cause you not belong to me anymore."


actually panjang lagi. malas nak tulis. haha. ni surat mintak maaf aku dekat ex aku dulu. dulu lah. sekarang dah tak. ikut haluan masing-masing. dia pun aku tengok dah happy dengan BF dia. so, aku pun happy lah. tak nak nak sedih kot. lagi pun aku sorang je yang baca benda lah ni. aku nak bagi bendalah ni kat dia dulu tapi aku takut. now aku simpan je dalam wallet. buat kenangan CINTA MONYET aku. haha. kau nak baca? nak tengok? meh aku lepuk kau dulu. memang tak lah kan! hahaha. malu lah aku kalau bagi orang tengok. so, itu jela kot. bye. :)

Love

loving you is like smoking cigarette. can't stop and can't get enough. it's addiction. and my love for you is like cigarette smoke. spreading widely into my heart. :) -Hsan-

Happy Birthday!

9 july 2011. it's my birthday. now i'm officially 19. hehe. thanks to all my friends who remember and wish my birthday. thanks a lot! love you guys. and for "zombaby" thanks for the cupcakes and movie! love ya. to fariz, jai, anep and azim thanks for the hardcore birthday song. it's fuckin' hilarious! i can't stop laughing! hahahaha. for my mum, i'm sorry for being a bad son, i'm sorry for everything. i can't be perfect. about the free call. i never use it. cause i know. no one would pick my call up. so, i off my phone for the whole day. i'm sorry for those who try to reach me. nothing special bout my birthday. no cakes, no party, no date. it just a birthday, people wish and forget it. so thats all. bye.